Posts Tagged ‘Duh!’


 

March 13, 2010

 

Are Both of You Applying?

Posted March 13 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+12 VOTES
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March 12, 2010

 

Wanted: Royal Screw-Up

Posted March 12 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, ,

+7 VOTES
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How About Making Proof-Reading a Step?

Posted March 12 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

+16 VOTES
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March 11, 2010

 

Keep It Stupid, Simple. . .

Posted March 11 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:,

simplek.gif

+50 VOTES
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Shouldn’t ‘Cleaning Our Work Area’ Come Last?

Posted March 11 by Hiring Manager J.G.
Tags:, , , , ,

Shouldn't 'cleaning our work area' come last?

0 VOTES
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March 9, 2010

 

Ultimate lulz. . .

Posted March 09 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

Yup, this came from an AOL address:

craigslist_newbie.gif

+236 VOTES
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March 7, 2010

 

She Eats Cereal Only When Blood Is Not Available. . .

Posted March 07 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , ,

+7 VOTES
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Starting Off On A Bad Note . . .

Posted March 07 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+7 VOTES
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March 6, 2010

 

Well, We Don’t Accept Interpretative Dances. . .

Posted March 06 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

I can do almost anything.  I am intelligent and can work with a team. I know it says to post resumes but hey those are boring

+5 VOTES
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March 5, 2010

 

Interview Insanity. . .

Posted March 05 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , , , ,

According to several sites on the net (i.e., possibly apocryphal) personnel executives of 100 major American corporations were asked for stories of unusual behavior by job applicants:

  • Said he was so well qualified [that] if he didn’t get the job, it would prove that the company’s management was incompetent.
  • Stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application.
  • Brought her large dog to the interview.
  • Chewed bubble gum and constantly blew bubbles.
  • Candidate kept giggling through serious interview.
  • She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to the music and me at the same time.
  • Balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later wearing a hairpiece.
  • Applicant challenged interviewer to arm wrestle.
  • Asked to see interviewer’s resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate.
  • Announced she hadn’t had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and French fries in the interviewer’s office.
  • Without saying a word, candidate stood up and walked out during the middle of the interview.
  • Man wore jogging suit to interview for position as financial vice president.
  • Said if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm.
  • Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions.
  • Wouldn’t get out of the chair until I would hire him. I had to call the police.
  • When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office.
  • Had a little pinball game and challenged me to play with him.
  • Bounced up and down on my carpet and told me I must be highly thought of by the company because I was given such a thick carpet.
  • Took a brush out of my purse, brushed his hair and left.
  • Pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a flash picture of me. Said he collected photos of everyone who interviewed him.
  • Candidate asked me if I would put on a suit jacket to insure that the offer was formal.
  • Said he wasn’t interested because the position paid too much.
  • While I was on a long-distance phone call, the applicant took out a copy of Penthouse, and looked through the photos only, stopping longest at the centerfold.
  • During the interview, an alarm clock went off from the candidate’s briefcase. He took it out, shut it off, apologized and said he had to leave for another interview.
  • A telephone call came in for the job applicant. It was from his wife. His side of the conversation went like this: “Which company? When do I start? What’s the salary?” I said, “I assume you’re not interested in conducting the interview any further.” He promptly responded, “I am as long as you’ll pay me more.” I didn’t hire him, but later found out there was no other job offer. It was a scam to get a higher offer.
  • An applicant came in wearing only one shoe. She explained that the other shoe was stolen off her foot in the bus.
  • His attache [case] opened when he picked it up and the contents spilled, revealing ladies’ undergarments and assorted makeup and perfume.
  • He came to the interview with a moped and left it in the reception area. He didn’t want it to get stolen, and stated that he would require indoor parking for the moped.
  • He took off his right shoe and sock, opened a medicated foot powder and dusted it on the foot and in the shoe. While he was putting back the shoe and sock, he mentioned that he had to use the powder four times a day, and this was the time.
  • Candidate said he really didn’t want to get a job, but the unemployment office needed proof that he was looking for one.
  • He whistled when the interviewer was talking.
  • Asked who the lovely babe was, pointing to the picture on my desk. When I said it was my wife, he asked if she was home now and wanted my phone number. I called security.
  • She threw up on my desk, and immediately started asking questions about the job, like nothing had happened.
  • Pointing to a black case he carried into my office, he said that if he was not hired, the bomb would go off. Disbelieving, I began to state why he would never be hired and that I was going to call the police. He then reached down to the case, flipped a switch and ran. No one was injured, but I did need to get a new desk.
  • Asked if I wanted some cocaine before starting the interview.
+587 VOTES
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Yum: Sippy Cup Martinis!

Posted March 05 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

+7 VOTES
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Your Klever.

Posted March 05 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+13 VOTES
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March 4, 2010

 

Most Inane Resume Item Ever. . .

Posted March 04 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , ,

+37 VOTES
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March 3, 2010

 

Dropping Science. . .

Posted March 03 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , ,

Crazy Stacey interviewing for the wife position on The Bachelor. . .

 

+15 VOTES
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March 2, 2010

 

How Soon Can You Stop?

Posted March 02 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

done-too-much.gif

+17 VOTES
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March 1, 2010

 

Ambition That Can Almost Vote. . .

Posted March 01 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

ambition1.gif

+5 VOTES
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Neither.

Posted March 01 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , ,

+11 VOTES
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A Stomach for Work. . . (User Submission!)

Posted March 01 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , ,

“Anonymous” reports that she was hiring a Junior Web Coordinator for a medical non-profit.  Here is why the candidate was not hired:

When asked in the interview to list his weaknesses, the male candidate puzzled for a few moments–as though he could not think of any–and started to answer, “Weakness? Huh. . . I’m not sure. . .”
After thinking hard, he finally perked up and responded brightly:
“My abs!”

+10 VOTES
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Will Work for $8/hour and a Glass Teat. . . (User Submission!)

Posted March 01 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , ,

Not Hired user, “Paula Plenty,” reports that a candidate for a customer service phone representative position talked to each of the three people with whom she interviewed about how important it was to have the ability to watch a portable television in her cubicle.  The candidate sealed her “not hired” fate by following up her interview with a letter that included:

I know you can understand that being allowed to watch TV helps keeps [sic] us sane during the downtime and giving good customer support really only takes one ear.  The customers on the phone don’t have to know that I have a TV and I like to watch TV at work because it doesn’t hurt my work, I have a mini TV that I like to keep on my desk and watch with a white earplug. My other ear can hear the phone and listen to customer support issues.  You have to trust me that it isn’t a problem even when very dramatic story is happening on my shows.

+20 VOTES
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February 28, 2010

 

Re: All the Other MCs. . .

Posted February 28 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

everyone_sucks.gif

+48 VOTES
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It’s So Hard To Find a Good Jose These Days.

Posted February 28 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+22 VOTES
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February 27, 2010

 

Good Question. . .

Posted February 27 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

shipping_haters.gif

+15 VOTES
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Posted February 27 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+13 VOTES
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Next Episode of “Dirty Jobs.”

Posted February 27 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+13 VOTES
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February 26, 2010

 

Quod Erat Demonstrandum. . .

Posted February 26 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, , ,

buddhist_blankout.gif

+36 VOTES
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Mouth Breather. . .

Posted February 26 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+11 VOTES
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You’re Silly!

Posted February 26 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+10 VOTES
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February 25, 2010

 

More Showing, Less Telling. . .

Posted February 25 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:,

oral_communicative.gif

+11 VOTES
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February 22, 2010

 

Looks Like You Have Already Exceeded Your Knowledge

Posted February 22 by Hiring Manager D.R.
Tags:, , , ,

Look Like You Have Already Exceeded Your Knowledge

+4 VOTES
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We Love a Business Tanktop. . .

Posted February 22 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+12 VOTES
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February 20, 2010

 

And Now, He Wants to Audit a Career. . .

Posted February 20 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:,

+12 VOTES
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Bloodsport 87.

Posted February 20 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+13 VOTES
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February 19, 2010

 

Now That You Mention It. . .

Posted February 19 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+8 VOTES
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February 18, 2010

 

Not Smarter Than a 5th Grader. . .

Posted February 18 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , ,

+23 VOTES
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Lack of Resume Does Speak for Itself. . .

Posted February 18 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+5 VOTES
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February 17, 2010

 

Does Failed Subject-Verb Disagreement?

Posted February 17 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+7 VOTES
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February 16, 2010

 

You Should Call Yourself No-lingual.

Posted February 16 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+13 VOTES
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February 14, 2010

 

Good To Know, Thanks.

Posted February 14 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , ,

+7 VOTES
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February 13, 2010

 

That’s One Way of Taking Care of Them.

Posted February 13 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+7 VOTES
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February 12, 2010

 

The Little Cash Register That Could. . .

Posted February 12 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

+11 VOTES
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Every Little Boy’s Fantasy.

Posted February 12 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+18 VOTES
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February 10, 2010

 

Every Child Left Behind. . .

Posted February 10 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+11 VOTES
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No, We’re Not.

Posted February 10 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+11 VOTES
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February 9, 2010

 

Your Next Boss. . . (User Submission!)

Posted February 09 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , ,

Thanks to Not Hired user, “Anthony,” for passing this along! It might be the single worst written job posting in the history of Craiglist:

+12 VOTES
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And This Photo Demonstrates What?

Posted February 09 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+11 VOTES
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You’re Not Hired or You Can’t Work Here.

Posted February 09 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+10 VOTES
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February 8, 2010

 

Don’t Be Too Hard On Yourself.

Posted February 08 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , , , ,

+10 VOTES
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Are You a Celebrity?

Posted February 08 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+6 VOTES
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February 6, 2010

 

No.

Posted February 06 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+12 VOTES
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February 5, 2010

 

Rhymes with Clunker. . .

Posted February 05 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

big_thunker.gif

+18 VOTES
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Master of the Double Entendre. . .

Posted February 05 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , , ,

+12 VOTES
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I’ll Learn Your Kids Good

Posted February 05 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

I'll Learn Your Kids Good

+2 VOTES
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February 4, 2010

 

A Brief Guide to the Millennials

Posted February 04 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, , , ,

I would be a good worker…I only had one job so far and that was doing the news papers! it got kinda tiering walking up door 2door all the time..but im not lazy.. things i like to do inmy spare time are ride my pocket bike,ride my gokart,swiming,and talking on the phone..

+10 VOTES
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Top 5 Worst Typos Ever!!!

Posted February 04 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, , , , , , , , , ,

1.Uh, the Kind that Can Spell?

Sorry Pukes

2.This One Stands on its Own. . .

3.Yum: Sippy Cup Martinis!

4.Let’s Not Get Catty. . .

5.No Beating around the Bush! (User Submission!)

The candidate was applying to be a receptionist at a veterinary hospital. At the bottom of her resume, she said “I really enjoy working around the pubic.”

+21 VOTES
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February 3, 2010

 

Not Following the Plot. . .

Posted February 03 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

plot1.gif

+6 VOTES
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Someone Is Missing the Plot. . .

Posted February 03 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , , ,

+16 VOTES
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A Real Team Player.

Posted February 03 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , ,

+26 VOTES
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Isn’t There a Better Way to Word This?

Posted February 03 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+5 VOTES
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February 1, 2010

 

Spot the Connection. . .

Posted February 01 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, ,

liberal_of_arts.gif

+14 VOTES
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January 30, 2010

 

Justin Guarini?

Posted January 30 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+7 VOTES
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January 29, 2010

 

Real Words are Good Mottos

Posted January 29 by Hiring Manager J.G.
Tags:, , ,

Real Words are Good Mottos

0 VOTES
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January 28, 2010

 

The Drugs Do Help!

Posted January 28 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

i am very responsible, dependent, and get along with kids very well

+11 VOTES
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Brokeback Phobic

Posted January 28 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , ,

+25 VOTES
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Great! Where Should We Meet?

Posted January 28 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+18 VOTES
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January 27, 2010

 

Completed /= Good

Posted January 27 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, , , ,

+16 VOTES
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Pass.

Posted January 27 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , ,

+13 VOTES
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We Recommend Proofreading.

Posted January 27 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+3 VOTES
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January 26, 2010

 

You Can Teach Finger Painting, But Not Spelling

Posted January 26 by Hiring Manager J.G.
Tags:, ,

You Can Teach Finger Painting, But Not Spelling

0 VOTES
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You Must Learn Punctuation in the Third Year

Posted January 26 by Hiring Manager D.R.
Tags:, , ,

You Must Learn Punctuation in the Third Year

0 VOTES
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No…………………………………

Posted January 26 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , ,

+13 VOTES
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But Not of Prepositions. . .

Posted January 26 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, , , ,

+6 VOTES
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January 25, 2010

 

Good Luck with That, Dipshit.

Posted January 25 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , , , , ,

+16 VOTES
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Sweet. . .

Posted January 25 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, ,

+19 VOTES
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Like a Polaroid Picture!

Posted January 25 by HiringManagerL
Tags:,

+6 VOTES
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January 24, 2010

 

You Are in Luck. . .

Posted January 24 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, ,

. . .we happen to be hiring for POSITION right now! 

job_title.gif

+16 VOTES
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January 23, 2010

 

This Charming Man. . .

Posted January 23 by Hiring Manager K.
Tags:, ,

non_mook_boss.gif

+5 VOTES
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Your Next Informer. . .

Posted January 23 by HiringManagerL
Tags:, ,

+8 VOTES
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Dopey Video. . .

Posted January 23 by Hiring Manager D.
Tags:, , , ,

+17 VOTES
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January 22, 2010

 

The Fluency of Dunces. . .

Posted January 22 by Hiring Manager D.
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+20 VOTES
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Your Dream Job. (User Submission!)

Posted January 22 by HiringManagerL
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A NotHired user directed us to this Craigslist posting:

+11 VOTES
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January 13, 2010

 

Lars and the Real Girl

Posted January 13 by Hiring Manager J.G.
Tags:,

lars and the real girl

+1 VOTES
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Any Percentage of Zero is Zero

Posted January 13 by Hiring Manager J.G.
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Any Percentage of Zero is Zero

0 VOTES
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Management Material.

Posted January 13 by HiringManagerL
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+32 VOTES
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January 12, 2010

 

Su deletreo es terrible.

Posted January 12 by HiringManagerL
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+78 VOTES
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January 11, 2010

 

Visual Non Sequitur of the Month. . .

Posted January 11 by HiringManagerL
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+7 VOTES
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January 9, 2010

 

Ummm. . . None?

Posted January 09 by Hiring Manager D.
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Please leave a message with the day/# of kids you need me to sit on.

+18 VOTES
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Why So Self-Deprecating?

Posted January 09 by HiringManagerL
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+8 VOTES
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A Little Too Much Maybe? (User Submission!)

Posted January 09 by HiringManagerL
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NotHired user HRGeneral sent us this application that a candidate submitted:

+19 VOTES
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January 8, 2010

 

Uh, the Kind that Can Spell?

Posted January 08 by Hiring Manager D.
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sorry_pukes.gif

+31 VOTES
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Welcome to SuperCuts!

Posted January 08 by Hiring Manager D.
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looken_hair.gif

+40 VOTES
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January 7, 2010

 

Nobdy Wil Hir U.

Posted January 07 by HiringManagerL
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+48 VOTES
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January 6, 2010

 

Totally.

Posted January 06 by Hiring Manager D.
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+36 VOTES
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A Headshot Would Have Been Just Fine.

Posted January 06 by HiringManagerL
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+5 VOTES
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January 4, 2010

 

We Feel the Same Way about Interviewing You.

Posted January 04 by Hiring Manager D.
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+15 VOTES
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Dum and Slo.

Posted January 04 by HiringManagerL
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+8 VOTES
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Do You Make Them Yourself?

Posted January 04 by HiringManagerL
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+5 VOTES
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January 3, 2010

 

Mastery. . . (User Submission!)

Posted January 03 by Hiring Manager D.
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An anonymous Not Hired user was hiring for a library position at a well-known university and received this utterly abstruse resume from a candidate with a Master’s degree in Communication:

[click to enlarge image]

+36 VOTES
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Candid Cameraman.

Posted January 03 by HiringManagerL
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+11 VOTES
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January 2, 2010

 

Tourette’s Syndrome?

Posted January 02 by HiringManagerL
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+29 VOTES
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